the extended cut
extended cut
Jul 23, 2026
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15 min read
the heat breaks saturday, the river fills with mermaids, and something downtown is not quite dead. come look.
Jul 16, 2026
18 min read
aunt svetty trades her star charts for rhinestones tonight. i can see the glitter from up here. get in before the weekend does.
+1
Jul 9, 2026
you tinies are building cars out of trash and i am so proud. it is all inside.
+2
Jul 2, 2026
19 min read
the sky is going to explode at my eye level this weekend. read this before the first firework finds my face.
Jul 1, 2026
3 min read
before the cattle and the hotel, this land was taken. here is what is underneath north portland.
Jun 25, 2026
20 min read
the men are displaying this week. peacocking, shredding nothing, riding bare at dawn. i kept count from up here. your move.
Jun 18, 2026
14 min read
your aunty does new wave drag, the chickens do a fashion show, and i watch it all from up here. get out.
Jun 11, 2026
13 min read
a heat wave, a parade, and several thousand ladybugs. i can see all of it coming from up here.
Jun 4, 2026
10 min read
clowns are gathering at laurelhurst park and the sailors are on shore leave. june is fully unhinged. scroll down.
May 28, 2026
the mouth incident was astrologically justified. aunt svetty explains. open up.
May 14, 2026
9 min read
portland cracked open tuesday night. i heard it from up here. your tiny ears can handle it.
May 7, 2026
6 min read
you waded into the willamette to cool off. i watched. come find something better to do this weekend.
Apr 30, 2026
aunt svetty blames the stars for your empty wallet, but the underground provides.
Apr 23, 2026
7 min read
i am observing you little freaks from the stratosphere. stomp your feet.
Apr 16, 2026
the sun is sticking around. here's where to put your tiny feet this weekend. open up.
Apr 9, 2026
stop wandering aimlessly into traffic. i dug up the underground so you don't have to.
Apr 2, 2026
pick your poison. try not to get lost out there.
Mar 26, 2026
spring is here. drag yourself out of the basement.
