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hey tiny.
fall became official tuesday, a little after five in the afternoon. no parade. no marching band. the light just leaned a few degrees further over and the whole city pulled on a sweater like it had been waiting since july for someone to blow a whistle.
some of you got a frog in your inbox last night at six. that was me. i was testing a new feature of the giant broadcasting system. and i leaned on the wrong button with a thumb the size of a canoe and a taxidermy frog playing a harp went out to the whole city, unannounced, like a singing telegram nobody ordered. he is still free, by the way. he is also, now, famous.
in one week. adx fest starts october 1. the maker space turns fifteen and celebrates for thirty-one straight days, which is exactly how long i would like my birthday to last. workshops, artist talks, open mics and gallery nights from st. johns down to milwaukie. the calendar is live. and on october 23 i am throwing one of those nights myself. battle of the battle jackets, a punk vest contest at brujos. dig out the denim. start the patches now. studs take longer than you think and hurt more than you remember. every tiny behind the wall gets a handmade gift at the door that night, made one at a time, and only for the people already back here.
this is everything that would not fit through the front door this week. a hundred events and nineteen screenings, sorted and in order, so you can plan like a person with a calendar instead of a person with forty tabs open.
back here this week: a burlesque revue about costco, attempts to disrupt the fabric of space-time, a comedian who got laid off and turned it into an hour, a jellyfish tribute that is not about the animal, and so much improv that i counted thirteen shows and had to go lie down on a hillside.
pick three. then pick one more for luck.
X X XX X X
[ SEEING ]
September Flight: The Dark & Cincinnati Sep 25 at 19:30, also Sep 26 at 19:30 and Sep 27 at 14:00 Imago Theatre | $38 [ more ] two don nigro solo plays, back to back. one man spends the night wondering if he exists. one professor lectures on sex and tragedy. you leave with more questions than either of them.
The Mikado: Adults' Night Out Sep 25 & 26 at 19:30 Portland Puppet Museum | $25 [ more ] gilbert and sullivan, performed by panda puppets, with adult jokes and a wine and cheese meet-and-greet. the pandas are available for photos. they will not be discussing what they said in act two. 21+.
Heart Throb: The Dream Date Show Sep 25 at 20:30 Kickstand Comedy | $12+ [ more ] comedians compete as desperate suitors for one real, single, visibly nervous person. everyone is lying on purpose. still the most honest dating pool in the city.
Big Baby Sep 26 at 19:30, also Sep 27 at 14:00 CoHo Theater | Pay-what-you-can [ more ] a grown adult is delivered onstage in a wicker basket like a very large casserole. no words the entire show. you will still feel called out. part of coho's fifth annual clownfest, which has a few more shows before the noses go back in the drawer on october 4. it returns every year. clowns always do.
MicroMania Pro Wrestling Sep 27 at 18:00 Oregon City Elks Lodge #1189 | $28.52+ [ more ] high-flying pro wrestling with the comedy cranked all the way up, inside an elks lodge. that carpet has survived bingo, weddings and wakes. it will not survive this. i have watched a lot of fights from a great height. none of them had a mounted elk judging.
ADX Fest Oct 1 through Oct 31 ADX | see info [ more ] a whole month of workshops, talks, open studios and gallery nights, with dozens of partner orgs spread across the region. the calendar is enormous. so am i. i like it already.
HOUSE OF DANGER Oct 1 at 20:30 Swan Dive | $17.85+ [ more ] the flyer reads, in full, "kinda wrestling. kinda drag. all fun." six words and a body slam. i have read grant applications that said less.
DRAGSPEARE Oct 3 at 19:00 The Q Center | $10 to $30 sliding scale [ more ] [ + all ages ] a shakespeare company funds next season by putting its actors in drag. to lip sync or not to lip sync. bring cash for tips. iambic pentameter has never once paid rent.
Incite: Queer Writers Read Oct 4 at 10:30 Atrium Movement & Events | Free [ more ] three queer poets read on one theme, festivity, and then the whole room talks it out. part of the portland poetry confluence, running all weekend at the same address. the readings are free. the small-press book fair is where your wallet goes to lie down.
[ LISTENING + DANCING ]
Canadian Tuxedo Party Sep 25 at 20:00 Arcadia | $5 [ more ] denim on denim, mandatory. the canadian national anthem plays at nine, then the runway, then a dance party that squeaks. i do not own jeans. the denim mill would need its own zip code. consider it a dress rehearsal for october 23.
Exist 2026 Sep 26, 20:00 to 06:00 The Watershed | $22.73+ [ more ] ten hours of drum and bass, breaks, house and techno. it starts saturday night and ends when the sun files a noise complaint.
Orbit: A Queer Dance Party Centered Around Astrology Signs Sep 26 at 20:00 Peacock PDX | $14 [ more ] a queer dance party organized by birth chart, with fifteen percent going to warm springs wildfire relief. dance like your rising sign is watching. blame mercury for whatever happens after.
Karaoke Week Main Event Sep 26 at 20:00 Hawthorne Hideaway | $10 [ more ] karaoke week ends here. the city's strongest voices fight for a title, and a room full of strangers learns every word of your power ballad. ten dollars and a great many witnesses.
jacques strappe Sep 26 at 21:00 jacques' loft | $20+ [ more ] chelsea starr, renaissance the dj and tourmaline, at a loft party named after a pun you have to say out loud. go on. say it slowly. now you are going. nine to two, bring the good stockings.
Soul Train PDX Grand Opening Sep 26 at 21:00 Soul Train PDX | $15 [ more ] a brand-new dance room opens its doors. the floor has never been danced on. somebody has to break it in. i volunteered, but my boots would splinter the hardwood and they have not even paid it off yet.
barn: 171. TYGAPAW Sep 26 at 22:00 Barn Radio | $15 to $25 [ more ] the nyc and jamaica dj brings hard, fast, queer techno to barn radio's downtown room. party number one hundred seventy-one. barn is not a series anymore. it is a lifestyle with a door fee.
Hardcore Circus Sep 29 at 20:00 Ming Lounge at the Republic Cafe | $5 suggested donation [ more ] headspace circus is back at the ming lounge on a tuesday. this month's flyer is two words long. that is double what they gave me last time. progress.
Acid Cult feat. Octo Octa Oct 3 Process PDX | $27.60 [ more ] octo octa headlines a night of acid techno in one of the darkest rooms in town. big name, small room, no windows. bring earplugs and a friend who knows where the exit is.
[ MAKING + DOING ]
Harvest Full Moon: Equinox Libra Season Gong Bath Sep 26 at 19:00 Full Bodied Yoga | $30 [ more ] ninety minutes of gongs, chimes, ocean drum and rain stick, timed to the first full moon of fall. you lie on the floor. the gong rearranges your insides. the big one carries far enough that i get a little of it too, and i am across the river.
Play Magic for Healers Sep 27 at 16:00 Portland Queer Healers' Collective | Free [ more ] drama therapy and play therapy for the people whose whole job is holding everyone else together. two hours where the healers finally get to play pretend and nobody bills them for it.
Sip 'n Stitch: Hand Sewing Social Sep 28 at 17:00 Company Wine Bar | $7 [ more ] scrap pdx hauls felt, needles and floss into a wine bar so you can sew tiny acorns and mushrooms. seven dollars covers the craft. the stitches get looser with every glass. that is called folk art.
Witchy Watercolor Sep 28 at 18:00 WonderLove | $33.85+ [ more ] paint two tarot postcards by candlelight. no painting or tarot experience needed. the fancy ticket adds a mini reading, so you can learn what your art says about your future. mostly that you need more water.
Poly Speed Dating Sep 28 at 18:30 Peacock PDX | $20 [ more ] choose-your-own-adventure speed dating for poly and enm folks, with flirty bingo and tarot in the rotation. the only speed dating night where "i'm already seeing someone" is the icebreaker. the shared calendar gets complicated fast.
[ ROAMING ]
Radical Mycology Convergence starts Sep 24 Mulino | $28.52+ [ more ] [ road trip ] [ + all ages ] part science lab, part arts festival, all fungus. natural dyes, wild food, citizen science and night walks to find the things that glow. kids 12 and under free. i could fit the whole convergence in a salad bowl. the mushrooms would still outnumber me, and every one of them would have an opinion.
Spirit of Halloweentown Sep 26 through Nov 1 St. Helens | Free plaza, attractions extra [ more ] [ road trip ] [ + all ages ] opening weekend. a real river town turns back into the fake one from the 1998 movie, and the courthouse gets a pumpkin bigger than most apartments. five weeks of it. nobody in st. helens will admit which town is the real one anymore.
Drag Me Outside: Ecological Walk Sep 26 at 11:00 Kindness Farm | Free / donation [ more ] [ ~ outdoors ~ ] [ + all ages ] the drag duo who walked you through the cemeteries trades headstones for a queer-led farm. biodiversity, permaculture, and a full contour in a mud field. new walk. same heels. the goats have not been warned.
Pee-wee Pub Crawl Sep 26 at 15:00 Southeast Portland | $23.18+ [ more ] costume contests, lookalike and laugh-alike contests, playhouse trivia, a tequila dance-off and a cat scavenger hunt. proceeds go to pdx cat trapper. i have waited my entire enormous life to hear the secret word. i know you are, but what am i.
RINSE! Oct 2 through Oct 5, gates at 10:00 near Walton | $125 [ more ] [ road trip ] a post-burn campout on a private meadow forty minutes west of eugene. potluck saturday night, then they burn the big structure. there is a creek and you are allowed in it. the organizers call themselves soaky burners. take them at their word and pack a towel.
October First Friday Street Art Party Oct 2 at 18:00 East Creative Collective | Free [ more ] [ + all ages ] thirty artists open their studios and se 2nd shuts down for a street party. music, performers, food, installations. the whole block turns into one gallery. i step over the barricades like a curb and try very hard not to become an installation.
[ EATING + SHOPPING ]
Goth Night w/ Lip Service Sep 25 at 18:00 Memory Den Vintage Mall | Free [ more ] a vintage mall goes dark for three hours. oddities, dark fashion, art, music and giveaways. finally, a mall that matches your wardrobe and your mood.
Latino Makers Food & Wine Convivio Sep 25 at 18:00 McMinnville | $100+ [ more ] [ road trip ] latino winemakers, chefs and makers take over wine country for the night. the priciest thing in this section and very likely the best fed. dress like you own a vineyard. act like you inherited it.
Portland Greek Festival Oct 2 through Oct 4 Holy Trinity Greek Orthodox Cathedral | Free entry, food and drink extra [ more ] [ + all ages ] year seventy-three. fifteen thousand people, one cathedral, and a loukoumades line with its own weather system. i will not fit through the church doors. i have made my peace with the parking lot. opa from out here.
[ BULLETIN BOARD ]
Jiu-Jitsu Brown Belch Pirate Seeks First Mate open now [ more ] two years, one rebuilt steel boat, the northwest passage, no salary. he needs someone to hold a camera steady while he walks on fire. the ad is longer than my forearm.
Free Taxidermy Frog Playing Harp first come [ more ] free to a good home. he has played the same harp since the seventies. the seller's dog sees a snack. be the audience he deserves.
Missed Connection: Thrown Into Me At A Punk Show open until answered [ more ] somebody got launched across a pit and the landing pad wants to be friends. the only question is your hair color. nobody knows the band.
Halloween Performers Wanted: Funeral Home Party party is oct 31 [ more ] a diy halloween party in a funeral home needs clowns, ventriloquists and a spooky cellist. pay is a little cash and all the drinks. the venue already knows how to handle a body.
Oregon Career Opportunity Grants ongoing [ more ]
five hundred to two thousand dollars for oregon artists with one specific next move: a residency, a show, a mentor. no deadline, so the only thing stopping you is you. i know. i am also you.
Another Hole in the Head: Film Submissions sep 30 [ more ]
san francisco's genre film festival wants your horror, sci-fi, weird westerns and whatever you shot in the woods at 3am. december at the balboa theatre. the regular deadline is next wednesday. the short on your hard drive is not going to submit itself.
ninety-five things are pinned to the board right now. one of them is a stack of fifty-year-old magazines tied up with rope, which is both the product and the packaging.
[ read the board ]
[ SCREENINGS ]
tim curry died last month. clue is back on a big screen this week, and that is the only correct response. three more picks below, and the rest of the week's screenings wait behind the wall.
Suspiria (1977) Sep 24 Tomorrow Theater, presented with Wild Soul [ more ] a ballet academy where the paint is too red, the score is too loud and the teachers are much too interested in you. the most beautiful movie ever made about a school you should transfer out of immediately.
Puss in Boots (2011) Sep 24 Clinton Street Theater [ more ] shrektember continues. a cat in boots with the voice of antonio banderas, which is all this sentence needs.
Blonde Crazy (1931) Sep 24 Hollywood Theatre, in 35mm [ more ] james cagney and joan blondell run small cons and fall in love, pre-code, which means nobody got in trouble for any of it.
The Cable Guy (1996) Sep 24 Academy Theater [ more ] jim carrey refuses to leave your life. the academy has booked it long enough that it also refuses to leave the theater.
What's Up, Doc? (1972) Sep 25 Laurelhurst Theater [ more ] four identical plaid suitcases in san francisco and barbra streisand causing all of it. a screwball comedy with a chase down a hill.
My Neighbor Totoro (1988) Sep 25 Academy Theater [ more ] [ + all ages ] a very large, very soft forest spirit waits at a bus stop in the rain. i relate to him on a personal level.
Contact (1997) Sep 25 Kiggins Theatre [ more ] jodie foster listens to space and space talks back. should have sent a poet.
Kwaidan (1964) Sep 25 Hollywood Theatre [ more ] four japanese ghost stories, painted rather than shot. the most gorgeous way to get the chills this week.
Puss in Boots: The Last Wish (2022) Sep 26 Clinton Street Theater [ more ] more shrektember. the cat is down to his last life and death himself is chasing him. far better than it has any right to be.
Times Square (1980) Sep 26 Academy Theater [ more ] two runaway teenage girls start a punk band in new york. patches optional. go get ideas for october 23.
The Battle of Algiers (1966) Sep 26 Academy Theater [ more ] the urgent, documentary-style account of algeria's fight for independence. still studied, still angry, still necessary.
The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) Sep 26 Kiggins Theatre, with the Denton Delinquents [ more ] the other rocky horror this weekend, across the river in vancouver. two shadow casts, one tim curry, and a whole city doing the time warp for him.
Diabolique (1955) Sep 26 Cinema 21 [ more ] a wife and a mistress team up to kill the man they share. then the body goes missing. the ending still comes with a polite request not to spoil it. i will honor that.
Ghost in the Shell (1995) Sep 27 Hollywood Theatre [ more ] a cyborg cop asks what makes a person a person, thirty years before your phone started asking you to prove you are not a robot. back on the hollywood's big screen, where it belongs.
Mistura (2024) Sep 27 Portland Latin American Film Festival [ more ] part of the portland latin american film festival. read the synopsis on the festival page and go in curious.
Batman (1989) Sep 27 Hollywood Theatre, in 70mm [ more ] burton's batman in 70mm, so the gotham skyline is almost as tall as i am. pair it with the batmusical if you want a full weekend of bat.
Clue (1985) Sep 29 Moreland Theater [ more ] tim curry as wadsworth the butler, sprinting through the entire plot in the last act like he left the stove on. three endings, one theater. rest easy, you magnificent ham.
Akira (1988) Sep 29 Hollywood Theatre [ more ] neo-tokyo, a motorcycle everyone wants, and a teenager with far too much power. the red bike alone is worth the ticket.
The Blair Witch Project (1999) Sep 29 Hollywood Theatre, in 35mm [ more ] three students, one map, a lot of shouting in the woods. i have been in those woods. i was the tall thing they did not mention.
Heathers (1989) Sep 29 Moreland Theater [ more ] the meanest, sharpest high school movie ever made. how very. same night as clue at the moreland, so make it a double.
Coraline (2009) Sep 29 Moreland Theater [ more ] [ + all ages ] a little door in the wall, a family that looks better on the other side, and buttons for eyes. stop-motion made down the road in hillsboro.
The Boxtrolls (2014) Sep 30 Moreland Theater [ more ] [ + all ages ] another laika picture, this one about small creatures who live underground and wear boxes. they would fit in my coat pocket. that is a compliment.
Mean Girls Oct 3 at 16:00 Tomorrow Theater | $15 [ more ] on october 3rd, you watch mean girls. the math is not hard.
come behind the wall.
it is roomier behind the wall. i would know. i am the wall.
i'm coming in!what's back here:
- the extended cut, every thursday
- the recurring calendar, always on
- tickets to tunnel vision pdx events
- surprises, stickers, zines + more