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hey tiny.
good news: no one drove into the willamette river this week. bad news: someone drove into the max again. i watched the metal scrape and sparks fly from three hundred feet up.
shoutout to the 20th annual 82nd ave of roses parade. it is a solid dose of east portland history for those of you surviving out in the numbers. nothing says spring quite like the delicate scent of petals mixing with the exhaust of a major arterial road. i tried to lean down and smell the procession last year and accidentally inhaled a traffic light. appreciate the blooms, tinies. watch out for the thorns.
also. thank you to the generous tinies who bought coffee last week. the days are getting longer. my giant body requires massive amounts of caffeine to stay awake and pace the grid.
keep sending your submissions. i have been actively featuring the events you tinies dig up and send my way, so keep feeding the machine. share the link with the rest of the underground.
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[ MAKING + LEARNING ]
Rose City Fashion Drawing: Second Nature | Apr 23 at 1800 | Kinship | $20.00 [ more ] circular fashion pop-up where you tinies draw clothing. i observe the y2k nostalgia from my place in the stratosphere.
Bread And Butter | Apr 24 | ADX Portland | Free [ more ] tinies discussing things and making crafts. do not glue yourselves together.
In-Person Class: Bird Alliance Of Oregon | Apr 25 at 1000 | Heron Hall, 5151 NW Cornell Road | $55 Members / $75 Non-Members [ more ] [ ~ outdoors ~ ] learning about creatures that fly near my face. pack water and a snack, limited space for humans.
Analog Synth Meetup | Apr 26 at 1500 | Control Voltage | Free [ more ] gear sharing and patch workshops. wire your machines to make sounds that mimic my snoring.
Intro To Hand Sewing Repairs | Apr 28 | Next Adventure | $5.00 [ more ] fix your broken tiny gear instead of throwing it away. practice stitching materials so you can survive the elements.
[ DOING + DANCING ]
The Power Of Three Vines | Apr 23 at 2100 | Living Room Wines (4818 N Lombard St) | $10 (Card Only) [ more ] drag performances and a canned food drive wrapped in a charmed theme. bring cans for the humans, dance till my heavy footsteps shake the bar.
DJ Assault / DJ PayPal | Apr 23 at 2100 | Swan Dive, 727 SE Grand | $26.84 [ more ] sweaty detroit bass for minimally clothed tinies throwing it. my giant foot taps along to the heavy resonance.
Ragnarok: Night Carnival | Apr 24 | Star Theater | $25.00-$162.20 [ more ] themed costumes and dark variety acts for little freaks. i might peek through the skylight.
Hockey Teeth W/ Valkerie And Double Play | Apr 24 at 2000 | Kelly's Olympian, 426 SW Washington St | $10 Adv/$15 Dos [ more ] tiny humans playing instruments while you stomp your little feet.
Amrytaversary | Apr 25 at 1900 | Wonderlove | Free [ more ] a one-year celebration of amryta collective with nine artists. move your limbs and pretend i am not watching.
Timba Night | Apr 25 at 2100 | Afterlife, 3632 SE Hawthorne Blvd | Free [ more ] monthly dancing to heavy rhythms. i feel the vibrations bouncing off the pavement.
Blend House Music | Apr 26 at 2100 | Back 2 Earth 3536 N.E. MLK, PDX | $5.00 [ more ] house beats by kevin davis jr and demetre baca. get inside and shake yourselves.
House Of Danger: #1 Contender Gauntlet Royale | Apr 29 at 2000 | The Swan Dive | $15.00 [ more ] a wrestling gauntlet where someone enters every two minutes. eliminate via pin-fall to challenge for the world title. brutal and tiny.
[ SEEING + LISTENING ]
Porch Kiss / VHS Ghost / Wallker | Apr 24 | Turn Turn Turn, Portland, OR | $10.00 [ more ] three bands in a room you've been ignoring. go stand near the amplifiers.
Tough Shit W/ Oregon Humanities | Apr 24 | PAM/CUT Tomorrow Theater | $15.00 [ more ] people talking about hard regional issues. i already know all the answers but you should probably go listen.
Tits Up | Apr 24 | Alberta Street Pub | $5.00 [ more ] little comedians speaking into microphones. i will chuckle and rattle your windows.
Night Garden Projection Art | Apr 24 at 2030 | Lan Su Chinese Garden | $25.00 [ more ] [ ~ outdoors ~ ] large-scale lights projected on botanical displays. i see the glow over the city walls.
Open Mic At The Off Beat | Apr 26 at 1700 | The Off Beat (8140 N Interstate Ave) | Free [ more ] bring your tiny art to the stage regardless of age or genre. little jerzy is featured, whoever that is.
Live Jazz: Dan Faehnle & Brent Follis | Apr 26 at 1730 | The Grant House, 1101 Officers Row, Vancouver, WA 98661 | $20.00 [ more ] intimate concert with the guitarist from pink martini. limited seats so you better book it before i step on the venue.
Akemie + Exciting! Excellent!! | Apr 26 at 2100 | Afterlife, 3632 SE Hawthorne Blvd | Free [ more ] solo hyperpop noise for your delicate eardrums. i can hear the synths from three miles up.
Killingsworth's Funniest Comedian | Apr 28 at 1900 | Turn Turn Turn, Portland, OR | Free [ more ] three-minute sets where you vote on who is funniest. i judge silently from the sky.
Dementia Research | Apr 29 | Aladdin Theater | $19.24-$56.45 [ more ] science on tap lecture series to learn about human brains. your biology fascinates me.
Exposed [storytelling] | Apr 29 at 1930 | Artichoke Community Music, 2007 SE Powell Blvd, Portland, OR 97202 | $20.00 [ more ] put down your screens and listen to other tinies confess things. pure human neuroses on display.
Satan's Skin (The Blood On Satan's Claw) | Apr 30 | Hollywood Theater | Sold Out [ more ] a rare 35mm print screening for walpurgisnacht. sold out because you specks love the devil.
Lipphead | Apr 30 | The Get Down | $24.61 [ more ] instrumental hip-hop beats in a basement. i could crush the roof but i respect the tempo.
Ural Thomas & The Pain | Apr 30 at 2000 | Laverne's, Woodlawn | Free [ more ] portland's soul brother number one leading an eight-piece r&b powerhouse. they are playing for free. open your tiny ears and show some respect to the legends while you sway your little bodies.
[ EATING + SHOPPING ]
Dark Market | Apr 25 at 1000 | Lincoln Memorial Park Mausoleum, 10713 SE Mt Scott Blvd | Free [ more ] buying dark wares near the dead. macabre capitalism for tiny goths.
Spring Krampus And Halfoween Bazaar | Apr 25 at 1100 | Devil-ish Little Things Museum, 3409 L St, Vancouver, WA 98663 | Free [ more ] [ + all ages ] bizarre goods halfway to halloween. little monsters running around in the daylight.
Indie Bookstore Day Book Swap | Apr 25 at 1400 | Rose City Book Pub, 1329 NE Fremont St | Free [ more ] bring a stack of paper, take a stack of paper. celebrate your fragile literature.
Portland Flea | Apr 26 at 1000 | SE 2nd & Stark | Free [ more ] [ ~ outdoors ~ ] vintage scraps and handmade goods. i could use your little shirts as a thimble.
Sidearc Minicon | Apr 26 at 1000 | Sidearc Store (North Portland) | Free [ more ] [ + all ages ] card vendors and voice actors congregating. geek marketplace for all tiny ages.
Book Swap & Shop | Apr 26 at 1200 | Thunderbird Bar, 5339 SE Foster Rd | Free [ more ] more trading bound paper, plus vendors and drinks. hydrate while you read.
[ EXTENDED CUT ]
SEEING + LISTENING
Igniting Desire: Erotic Stories From The Second Half Of Life | Apr 23 | Back Door Theater | $See Website For Details [ more ] older tinies sharing intimate stories for the fertile ground festival. entirely too much information but you will love it.
Band Of Outsiders X Art & About | Apr 23 | PAM/CUT Tomorrow Theater | $15.00 [ more ] interactive screening event for human eyes.
Ronstadt Revival | Apr 24 | The Historic Rogue | Go To Website For More Details [ more ] a tribute to linda ronstadt. belting classics into the void.
Peruvian Shamanic Foundations - The Art Of Tracking Energy | Apr 25 | Soul Ascension Studio 300 East 13th Street #103 Vancouver, WA | Sliding Scale: $44-$66 [ more ] learning to see invisible forces with your intuition. practice boundaries and journey tracking so you do not get lost in the ether.
The Chronology Of Water X Movie Book Club | Apr 26 at 1500 | Tomorrow Theater, 3530 SE Division | Sold Out [ more ] sold out translation of an experimental memoir exploring complex trauma. exhausting but necessary for your fragile little psyches.
Murder Scandinavian Style: The Man On The Roof | Apr 28 | Nordia House | $25.00 [ more ] nordic crime stories involving corruption. cinematic darkness for little detectives.
William Basinski | Apr 28 | Star Theater | $37.57 [ more ] high-concept ambient electronic compositions. the sound loops and decays just like your tiny lifespans.
Killingsworth's Funniest Comedian | Apr 29 at 1900 | Haymaker, Portland, OR | Free [ more ] seven comedians getting exactly five minutes to prove themselves. no repeat jokes permitted under my watch.
Killingsworth's Funniest Comedian | Apr 30 at 1900 | The Nosh Pit, Portland, OR | Free [ more ] see above.
DANCING + DOING
Stumpfest XI: Night Two | Apr 24 | Mississippi Studios, 3939 Mississippi Ave | Go To Website For More Info [ more ] torche and danava playing loud enough to rattle my kneecaps. wear your tiny earplugs.
Baile World | Apr 24 at 2200 | Process, 5040 SE Milwaukie Ave | $16.60 [ more ] usbcheck and cquestt pushing sound waves at night. sweat it out.
Stumpfest XI: Night Three | Apr 25 | Mississippi Studios, 3939 Mississippi Ave | Go To Website For More Info [ more ] all them witches and the danny carey trio. more fuzz and heavy drums for the weekend.
Musique Plastique & Partly Anniversary | Apr 25 at 1200 | 640 SE Stark | Free [ more ] a grand opening party happening. just show up and listen.
Free Punk Show In A Hot Dog Restaurant | Apr 26 | Zach’s Shack | Free [ more ] [ + all ages ] ska bands blaring inside a tiny sausage building. totally free and completely absurd.
Headspace Circus: Cyber Industrial Revolution | Apr 28 | Ming Lounge At The Republic Cafe | $5.00 [ more ] cyber industrial noises in a lounge. await the fliers for further transmission details.
Ecstatic Dance Portland | Apr 29 at 1900 | The Den (116 SE Yamhill) | $20.00 [ more ] sweaty. barefoot. flailing.
MAKING + SHARING
Rockaway Writers Rendezvous | Apr 24 | Rockaway Beach, OR | $25.00 [ more ] [ roadtrip ] three days of workshops and open mics on the coast. go bleed your feelings onto paper.
Succulent Propagation Workshop | Apr 25 at 1400 | Pistils Nursery | Call For More Info [ more ] slicing leaves to grow new green things. includes a starter kit for your windowsill.
Free Workshop | Apr 25 at 1400 | Tabor Space, 5441 SE Belmont St | Free [ more ] guided art experience to explore human chronic pain. express yourselves via hands-on trauma processing.
Portland Sticker Swap | Apr 26 at 1200 | Close-In SE Location | Free [ more ] [ + all ages ] gather your sticky paper squares and trade them with others. hosted by wokeface.
Crafty Workshops: Clay Bento | Apr 26 at 1400 | Onigiri Gaijin | $40 Adults / $20 Kiddos [ more ] [ + all ages ] shaping clay boxes on a sunday afternoon. reserve your spot before there is no clay left.
EATING + SHOPPING
Heritage & Harvest Supper: The Che | Apr 25 | 920 NE Glisan St, Portland, OR 97216 | $92.00 [ more ] eating food to tell a story of migration and harvest. digest your feelings.
Les Voitures Au Printemps | Apr 25 at 1000 | The Water Oasis, Newberg, OR | Free [ more ] a morning social event. registration is required to prove you are real.
Rumble In The Jumble | Apr 26 | The High Water Mark | Free [ more ] interactive arts and a bazaar crawl. run around and touch things.
Portland Flea April Market | Apr 26 at 1100 | The Redd, 831 SE Salmon Street | Free [ more ] [ ~ outdoors ~ ] flea season commences. swarm the stalls like the little ants you are.
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want to be a local star? hit reply and pitch me a column or an idea. i am always looking for loud voices from down below to amplify.
i can see a lot from up here, but even my eyes cannot pierce concrete. sometimes i miss the basement shows and the alleyway pop-ups. submit your events so i can keep the grid updated.
take this flyer and paste it to a telephone pole. use wheatpaste, not tape.
buy me a coffee. i am working on something heavy behind the scenes. the tinies who fuel my caffeine intake will be the first to get a special gift when it finally drops.
stay low.
janet
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